Warning. This is not my normal blog today because my heart is broken for a friend. She lost the love of her life this past week and life for her will be drastically different than she has known. I have had a few friends travel down this road the past few years.
I am always especially heartbroken when a friend loses their soul mate, the one they thought they would spend the rest of their life with. It is a sad chill that goes to my bones. They found something I never did and now have lost what I hoped they would have forever. But, as life and illness do, they got in the way.
And though, sad to blog on, it somehow felt appropriate for Valentine’s Day this week.
There are a few holidays I do not particularly care for as a single, never married, childless woman. Valentine’s Day and Mother’s Day top the list. Christmas is a little easier, as the holiday isn’t about us, or at least, it’s not supposed to be; and I am always included by my extended family.
Valentine’s Day is about pouring love onto your significant other. According to television, you must buy the right flowers, the right perfume, the right diamonds, the right greeting card, go to the right restaurant or you fall short. There is no in-between. Which leaves me wondering,
Why are all the holidays so commercialized now?
Remember Valentine’s Day in grade school?
I have determined they set the bar for my feelings of Valentine’s Day failure. I used to get Snoopy hearts in thin paper envelopes. Now? I still get plenty of envelopes, only now they’re filled with bills and there is no love lost there.
Before you get all in my face about the self-pity roll, it isn’t. I am actually used to fast forwarding through all the ads that could make me sad. I have learned not to focus on what I do not have, but to focus on what I do have. It is a wallow tunnel to do anything less.
But my friends that have lost their soul mates are about to face a holiday that will do nothing more than remind them of the love they have lost. Over and over, until it is passed.
Remember that when you are posting on Facebook; it is the greatest vehicle to drive home the point that others have something you wish you did, but don’t. It can rub your face in hurt, however unintentionally.
Share love outward. Post an encouraging word to the many whose hearts will be aching this week. Simple words of remembrance, or something that will make them laugh.
If you are one of those who have lost their love and are heartbroken, I am so sorry. I wish I could make this holiday easier for you. There is nothing that makes grief easier. I know, because I’ve looked.
For those of you who have their soul mate beside you, seize every second. Love fully and completely. Those seconds become memories to be cherished for years to come.
To everyone, life is not about you. We were not created to be selfish. It is about the love you can share while you can with so many others. Take the time this week to do just that – share the love.